With very little provocation, my husband can be thoughtless and selfish, unwilling to show the respect and honor I deserve. He tells people publicly how little he cares about money to justify his parsimonious ways. My Husband Is A Rich Controlling Miser. If the person needing care does genuinely have to pay for their own care, then it is that person’s money and assets ONLY that should be taken into account – not their spouse’s or their partner’s money, or indeed any other family member’s money. I know how difficult it is to get help when married to a narcissist of “status”. My husband is a far better money manager than I am, and a better negotiator too, so he does the hard, boring bit (imo), BUT I am equal and can do as I wish, when I wish, with all the passwords and no questions (I suppose if I suddenly went mad and drained the accounts with no warning he might say something LOL! She listed out a number of things that she was unhappy about. I don’t need a female. I’m sick, and all my husband can care about is how much money we can save. My husband is the police chief. He simply disagreed. My husband do … He had told me, throughout our marriage and the last month, that he wasn’t changing. Studies show that money is a common area of conflict for couples. Communication is one of the strongest features of a happy marriage. It’s like nothing is good enough and I just can’t bring myself to do anything for him because he will complain or easily get annoyed with any ideas I offer up which conflict with his own. He is currently on Medicaid and Medicare and receives $1,800 a month in disability payments. I, for some reason, and for the last couple of years, have been taking care of all the bills with my income. Steve Webb replies. Would my siblings and I have loved to receive a little inheritance? I am the one who has to take care of things financially with just about no help from my husband. He is a spender, to his (and our) detriment; I’m a saver. He isn’t a patient listener and rarely pays attention to you while all the while expecting you to listen to him. I have to pay all the bills. When your husband doesn’t clean up even his part of the mess but just leaves it for you to do or plays video games instead of putting the kids to bed or wants you to notice the yard work he did but never says a word about all the work you do, it can get irritating. I am 40 years old and we have two daughters, 9 years and 14 years old. My husband suffers from dementia. He has in the past hid very large debts from me ($25k, $10k, $5k - at various times), which I’ve had to bail him out every time. 1. Every year, 53,000 'self-funders' go into care homes. It was a tough call but I’m much happier to have my freedom back. My husband has dementia and may have to go into residential care. This is why I only care about money now. He has a job and isnt making enough money to support the family! I had been working as a teacher, but I got in a car accident and could no longer do the job well. My point is money is a need for everyone and we can not always control it. Mine you, we also have 2 kids in the house and he has 2 outside of the house. Soon after we got married, I realized that my husband accrued late-payment fees on his credit cards month after month. My husband has been moody since we got back from vacation. Problem is: While most of the world is connected, my husband is one of the estimated 13 percent of Americans who doesn’t regularly use the Internet. I don’t want kids. Ask Him About It Tips To Solve The Love Problem. Your husband stops communicating. We both work independent jobs. My husband does not respect my boundaries or my … Doesn’t take interest in your interests. By Steve Webb for This Is Money. I have a state pension of just £120 a week, while my husband has a state pension and an occupational pension which pay for all our bills. Expect the process to take about three months. I got pregnant, within a week my husband fought with me and not talked for about a week. Read more here about paying for care … He is only concerned about what his needs are even when it comes to matters related to your family or your sex life. My heart hurts for you all. He and his ex both had good jobs and they had no third-party life insurance and their 8-year-old had no college fund. The Cure for the Chronically Self-Consumed Man. He picks on things I say and do. I retired at 62 to take care of him and receive $1,049 a month. Unfortunately, because of the situation we're living in it would be difficult for me to leave. Selfish Husband. If all of a sudden your husband starts dodging essential conversations, it can be a sign that he feels that you do not understand him. My husband often does not know what is in our bank account, flies off on work, spends a large amount of money on dinner and drinks, and then leaves me scrimping on grocery bills. Published: 03:10 EST, 8 May 2018 | … Ours was love marriage, waited 2 years for my husband's parents approval before getting married. In some cases, the wife has to ask, remind or grovel for money every month to take care of household or personal expenses. I tried to go to a womens shelter once and they turned me away because of who my husband is. The week before only i though like I’m the luckiest girl in the world since i got a very lovable husband. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. I just need common sense and money. If I don’t take care of the bill doesn’t get paid. ... but i take care of my Disabled Husband 24/7. My mum in law has Alzheimer’s dementia and has now started to go out all hours of the night in which care line call me as her door is alarmed I am currently feeling so much pressure to go out and find her. But in secret, he is money crazy. My biggest issues with my husband is mostly that we have two completely different thought processes when it comes to money. My husband I have been together for 24 years and married for 18 years. he insults me and demeans me i do all the chores for him but am totally not appreciated. Don’t worry; you will have clarity at the end of this, which is all you really need to make a clear decision and either move forward or make things work. If the husband takes care of everything, from earning and spending, to saving and investing, there is a tendency to dictate terms to the non-earning spouse. All for money: Regina Daniels could care less about her husband bringing a new wife into her home News popped up over… News popped up over the weeks that Regina Daniels’ husband will be getting married to his 7th wives. I could go on. I don’t care about sex. Given our differences, I decided to get a divorce after 15 years of marriage. I don’t want to get married. Question - (8 January 2011) : 3 Answers - (Newest, 8 January 2011): A female age 36-40, anonymous writes: i still love my husbnd to the core but all he cares about is money. Make the most of your savings. Never mind the bruises I was sporting. Over the days and weeks that followed, my husband stood his ground. we fight all the time about Money and if i want or need some thing then i have to find a way to get it cause he cant afford us both . I am going to give you a list of 15 signs that he doesn’t care about you so that you can assess the situation and know for sure once and for all. So it’s best to check you still have enough money to pay for your care during this time. I am married for almost 3 years now. he does not care for me nor respect me. With help from my therapist, I heard him. I want to strangle him to show him how i feel if he wont understand. He is now in Stage 3 renal failure and will probably need nursing home care in the next year or so. This is a true signs your husband doesn't care about you anymore because anyone who does this have a cold heart. this is why you need to follow the tips that we’ll give you to mend the problem in your marriage; 1. He controlled all the money and gave me an allowance for raising the kids. I can assure you, after nearly 25 years of marriage, it never stops, the work required to have sex, make money, have children, raise children, pay bills, take care of family, have all the answers, be up all night when someone is sick, no, it never stops, life is a one way ticket, time only moves forward. My husband is now looking to get her in a care home as she can no longer wash or feed herself and often goes out with no trousers on. My point? My parents were fortunate that they had saved enough money over the years to pay privately for both of their rooms in the nursing home. I didn’t have to explain myself differently — he understood me. Of course you don’t want to let go of the marriage without a fight right? The partnership I envisioned was not the one he wanted. I look at my husband and while I still care about him in a general way, I don't love him anymore. I help with child care for my grown up daughter, who lives with us. I am a woman who makes more than my husband and our situation is growing less unique by the day. What happens to my state pension if my husband moves into a care home? I did my best but after our first son was born, my husband did everything he could to undermine my confidence in my … 4. My husband can revert to his worse instincts when troubles arise. 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